The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed
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- Update Date：2025-09-06
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- Author：Mystery
- ISBN：0312360118
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Summary
"One of the most admired men in the world of seduction" （The New York Times） teaches average guys how to approach， attract and begin intimate relationships with beautiful women
For every man who always wondered why some guys have all the luck， Mystery， considered by many to be the world's greatest pickup artist， finally reveals his secrets for finding and forming relationships with some of the world's most beautiful women。 Mystery gained mainstream attention for his role in Neil Strauss's New York Times bestselling exposé， The Game。 Now he has written the definitive handbook on the art of the pickup。
He developed his unique method over years of observing social dynamics and interacting with women in clubs to learn how to overcome the guard shield that many women use to deflect come-ons from "average frustrated chumps。"
The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed shares tips such as:
*Give more attention to her less attractive friend at first， so your target will get jealous and try to win your attention。
*Always approach a target within 3 seconds of noticing her。 If a woman senses your hesitation， her perception of your value will be lower。
*Don't be picky。 Approach as many groups of people in a bar as you can and entertain them with fun conversation。 As you move about the room， positive perception of you will grow。 Now it's easy to meet anyone you want。
*Smile。 Guys who don't get laid， don't smile。
For every man who always wondered why some guys have all the luck， Mystery， considered by many to be the world's greatest pickup artist， finally reveals his secrets for finding and forming relationships with some of the world's most beautiful women。 Mystery gained mainstream attention for his role in Neil Strauss's New York Times bestselling exposé， The Game。 Now he has written the definitive handbook on the art of the pickup。
He developed his unique method over years of observing social dynamics and interacting with women in clubs to learn how to overcome the guard shield that many women use to deflect come-ons from "average frustrated chumps。"
The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed shares tips such as:
*Give more attention to her less attractive friend at first， so your target will get jealous and try to win your attention。
*Always approach a target within 3 seconds of noticing her。 If a woman senses your hesitation， her perception of your value will be lower。
*Don't be picky。 Approach as many groups of people in a bar as you can and entertain them with fun conversation。 As you move about the room， positive perception of you will grow。 Now it's easy to meet anyone you want。
*Smile。 Guys who don't get laid， don't smile。
Reviews
Stiltzkin Vanserine
，
If all you seek in women is coitus， this book is for you。 On second thought， women and girls should probably read this book， too， in order to identify potential sexual predators。
Akshay Anand
，
。。。more
Fouad
，
I think you can get away with just being yourself， unless you want to do it for sport then this book will seem relevant to you。The book’s methods take too many assumptions into consideration， in fact， you may only attempt this with a particular crowd。 Too much over-thinking for what might be the most challenging hobby of them all。 Gave it an extra star because the method， works。
Chris
，
Pretty Good Book。 There were some good techniques based on psychology and stuff， and some practical examples。 Maybe some more infields would really be better analyzing every part， including body language and other aspects。
Peter Adams
，
With plenty of evolutionary biology theory， dog training techniques， some NLP terms， and chess analogies， The Mystery Method teaches how to pick up girls， in the nerdiest way ever conceived。 And it’s great。Mystery started off as a magician， which requires the skill of approaching people in an unoffensive way while entertaining them， and then gained an interest in picking up women。 He has spent many years of devoted， painstaking "research"， as a sort of ethologist geek studying normal human being With plenty of evolutionary biology theory， dog training techniques， some NLP terms， and chess analogies， The Mystery Method teaches how to pick up girls， in the nerdiest way ever conceived。 And it’s great。Mystery started off as a magician， which requires the skill of approaching people in an unoffensive way while entertaining them， and then gained an interest in picking up women。 He has spent many years of devoted， painstaking "research"， as a sort of ethologist geek studying normal human beings and their mating process， and he has done a really good job condensing his many years of teaching into a small， entertaining book。There are two objectives in life， Mystery explains， to survive and reproduce。 Simple as that。 Similar to his ethics， his methodology to pick up girls is also grounded in evolutionary biology and psychology。Mystery uses all kinds of strange terms and psychology jargon， displaying graphs， etc。。。 Some illustrations seemed like satire， making it unnecessarily complex。 I get the feeling Mystery is deliberately trying to sound weird to please what he figured would be the target audience。 For instance， he describes “making her like you” as “triggering her attraction brain-circuits” - perhaps as a way to emphasise the predictability of the response。There is no doubt that Mystery is a master at meeting women， and he packed the book with good advice。 The book focuses quite a bit on the micro-techniques to come off as ever so higher value， but he's also advocating a much more holistic approach， for instance， live your dream！ Have a cool life， don’t make pickup your whole identity， etc。。。 Mystery wants to leave as few things to chance as possible and therefore has provided the most systematic way of looking at the process of picking up girls I've seen。A good pickup consists of 1） opening and generating attraction， 2） creating comfort， and then 3） seduce her sexually， in that order。 To do that you must learn how to demonstrate high value （DHV） quickly and consistently， pass her congruence tests， maintaining a strong frame， until you get enough indicators of interests （IOIs）， to move onto the next stage and create comfort and continually test her willingness to comply to your requests， in a gradually increasing degree， until sex。There is a large emphasis on comfort。 Don't be just another guy who was wacky and cool in the club。 Make her get to know you。 Also， avoid super-fast one night stands。 Mystery advocates creating genuine connections， and delay seduction after you get to know each other， so she won't regret sleeping with you and will be happy to meet you the day after。 This advice is novel to me from pickup literature。 Real players must have the self-restraint to delay sex before enough comfort is established， which typically occurs in about seven hours， also called the seven-hour rule。Mystery advocates an indirect approach， not explicitly hitting on the "target，" but instead， demonstrates high value and keeps validation and attention just beyond reach for her， and continually testing her compliance level。Some points I liked in particular:"Smile。 Guys that don't have success with women don't smile。"Become a talkative， sociable guy with an exciting life， invite her to come along。When she asks what you do， consider why she’s asking。 Is it just to make conversation？ Does she want to get to know you？ Or genuinely cares about the way in which you earn money？ If she wants to know you， tell her the process from childhood and how I got here。 You become more relatable that way。Don't get stuck up on one conversational thread。 When people are afraid to change topics， they care too much。 Have multiple threads going。 Don’t be afraid to cut boring topics short abruptly。If your frame is strong enough， you can get away with anything。 。。。more
Đào Nam
，
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers。 To view it， click here。 Awsome
Brandon Buzarde
，
Science。。。not quite。 But super entertaining。
Svalbard
，
Ho saputo di questo “metodo Mystery”， infallibile sistema per conquistare e portarsi a letto ragazze， su un libro che ho recentemente letto e recensito， “Uomini” di Isabel Losada。 La solita bancarella mi ha fatto capitare tra le mani questo libro che difficilmente avrei comprato a prezzo pieno， e me lo sono letto pieno di curiosità （e， chissà mai， magari ne sarebbe venuto anche qualche buon consiglio…） Allora， per quanto concerne la teoria， ovvero la dinamica sociale delle relazioni tra uomini e Ho saputo di questo “metodo Mystery”， infallibile sistema per conquistare e portarsi a letto ragazze， su un libro che ho recentemente letto e recensito， “Uomini” di Isabel Losada。 La solita bancarella mi ha fatto capitare tra le mani questo libro che difficilmente avrei comprato a prezzo pieno， e me lo sono letto pieno di curiosità （e， chissà mai， magari ne sarebbe venuto anche qualche buon consiglio…） Allora， per quanto concerne la teoria， ovvero la dinamica sociale delle relazioni tra uomini e donne， è difficile dargli torto。 Questo libro conferma in pieno cose che del mio ci ho messo un sacco di tempo a capire， ma che pure ricevono conferme da ben più autorevoli studi di antropologia o di psicosociologia （come， ad esempio， “Tabula Rasa” di Steven Pinker o “La macchina dei memi” di Susan Blackmore）， e che sono alla base della differenza della sessualità maschile e femminile （a farla breve， il fatto che per ragioni biologiche e procreative gli uomini cercano tante donne， e che le donne cercano， generalmente， un solo uomo - ovviamente questa è la tendenza; ancora， che mentre per una donna conta di più il fatto di trasmettere all’uomo un’immagine sana - gioventù e bellezza - per un uomo agli occhi di una donna conta la capacità di essere un animale sociale， di saper dominare le dinamiche di gruppo， di “avere successo”， meglio se monetizzabile… Beceri luoghi comuni？ Io ho fatto di tutto per crederlo， peccato che poi， ad un certo punto， mi sono reso conto che， ci piaccia o no， le cose stanno proprio così…） Quello che mi convince di meno è la dimensione “pratica”， ovvero la ricetta che il “giocatore” dovrebbe seguire per realizzarsi sessualmente （cosa che， ça va sans dire， significa portarsi a letto il maggior numero di donne， meglio se belle o bellissime）。 Innanzi tutto， il “terreno di caccia” sono locali tipo bar， discopub e analoghi。 L’approccio， minuziosamente descritto， consiste nell’intercettare un gruppo in cui ci siano delle belle ragazze （le belle ragazze raramente vanno in giro da sole - questo è vero）， rompere il ghiaccio， e poi in qualche modo mettersi a fare lo splendido， cioè fare di tutto per manifestare una personalità interessante… fino a far cadere nella trappola il proprio “bersaglio”， fondamentalmente stordendolo di chiacchiere。 Il tutto dovrebbe portare la lei prescelta a pensare: “Ma chi è questo stronzo… eppure così affascinante？” （Dato di fatto， che non avevo bisogno di questo libro perché mi venisse disvelato: gli stronzi beccano assai di più dei “bravi ragazzi”。。。） Non metto in dubbio che tutto questo potrebbe funzionare。 Ma forse funziona meglio in una realtà perennemente in movimento， come quella americana， e con una quantità pressoché illimitata di “luoghi di caccia”。 In situazioni italiane， o comunque piccole o provinciali， una volta che gli astanti hanno capito le tue strategie， diventa ben difficile poterle replicare senza fare la figura del buffone o di vedersi incollare addosso l’etichetta di quello che ci prova con tutte。 Qui a Torino， dove le compagnie di amici sono chiuse， blindate e lucchettate， e si entra solo se presentati e raccomandati （e non è neanche detto）， un estraneo che cerca di “penetrare un gruppo” otterrebbe solo qualche sorriso di cortesia， come quello che si rivolge a un mattoide che attacca bottone per strada con discorsi strampalati， per poi voltargli le spalle e riprendere a farsi gli affari propri。 Peggio andrebbe， credo， al sud， dove una volta capito il gioco si rischierebbe di venire rullati di botte da fratelli， cugini， fidanzati veri o aspiranti tali del “bersaglio”。。。 Ancora， c’è l’aspetto legato al fatto che in ambienti come quelli descritti， in cui si va per divertirsi o socializzare， è abbastanza prevedibile， anche se non scontato， che possano nascere incontri e in qualche modo storie… e inoltre sono abbastanza off limits per una persona che ha ritmi normali di lavoro， se il giorno dopo non vuole essere uno zombie （il metodo Mystery prevede di uscire “a caccia” almeno quattro sere alla settimana…） Ben più difficile， secondo me， è “andare a punto” in luoghi casuali， o in ambienti quotidianamente frequentati dove ci si conosce con altri presupposti: il posto di lavoro， la palestra， l’autobus o il treno， il supermercato， per la strada… Spiegaci questo， Mystery。 。。。more
A。J。 Weiss
，
As someone to whom "game" never came natural， this was an eye-opening read even at 31-years-old。 It's amazing how many seemingly innocuous social behaviors can be viewed as belonging to a subconscious system that produces or extinguishes attraction between two people。 Highly recommend for both men and women。 Acceptable or superior substitute to Neal Stauss's The Game。 As someone to whom "game" never came natural， this was an eye-opening read even at 31-years-old。 It's amazing how many seemingly innocuous social behaviors can be viewed as belonging to a subconscious system that produces or extinguishes attraction between two people。 Highly recommend for both men and women。 Acceptable or superior substitute to Neal Stauss's The Game。 。。。more
Andrea
，
comprato per curiosità， il libro spiega queste teorie ma risulta presto abbastanza sconclusionato tanto che dopo circa metà libro mi ha stancato
Salam Alrbei
，
Fascinating
Philip Parkison
，
Little sexist and promote Token resistance。 If a girl says no she probably regrets sleeping with you and doesn't need her to coerce her to sex。 Little sexist and promote Token resistance。 If a girl says no she probably regrets sleeping with you and doesn't need her to coerce her to sex。 。。。more
Lisajean
，
I read this after finishing Men on Strike， because apparently I’m a masochist。 I can see how some of these techniques would work on insecure women， but it sets men up for an exhausting and lonely life trying to maintain this method。 However， I do have a soft spot for this book because Mystery includes rollerblading as one of the cool things men can use to impress girls。 In fact， he suggests talking about “the time you bladed down a steep hill and survived” to win over not only the girl you’re in I read this after finishing Men on Strike， because apparently I’m a masochist。 I can see how some of these techniques would work on insecure women， but it sets men up for an exhausting and lonely life trying to maintain this method。 However， I do have a soft spot for this book because Mystery includes rollerblading as one of the cool things men can use to impress girls。 In fact， he suggests talking about “the time you bladed down a steep hill and survived” to win over not only the girl you’re interested in but her whole group of friends。 I admit that I could be wooed by such a story - I could tell him about my favorite hills！ We could go on a rollerblading date！ Maybe do a roller disco dance at our wedding！ - but I might be in the minority here。 。。。more
T。C。 Anderson
，
Originally written October 2007I couldn't finish this。 Maybe it's just my being born a female and reading this， I don't know， but I laughed and laughed and laughed。 Sorry， Erik von Markovik， no offense。I enjoyed the show， I really did。 The Pick-up Artist on VH1 was fun， different， experimental， and like well-constructed reality shows， had me wondering who would win the grand prize in the end。 But I'll bet dollars to donuts the contestants didn't have to read this book。It's not bad。 It's interest Originally written October 2007I couldn't finish this。 Maybe it's just my being born a female and reading this， I don't know， but I laughed and laughed and laughed。 Sorry， Erik von Markovik， no offense。I enjoyed the show， I really did。 The Pick-up Artist on VH1 was fun， different， experimental， and like well-constructed reality shows， had me wondering who would win the grand prize in the end。 But I'll bet dollars to donuts the contestants didn't have to read this book。It's not bad。 It's interesting。。。to the point right before it becomes a confusing smattering of words that really contain only a simple message: Go get 'em tiger。 I came into this book with an open mind， taking full note of the book's subtitle （"How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed"）。 As a female， I figured I wouldn't agree with the perspective from which it was written， and I had that spot on。 But， for gents seeking a heart-felt， long-lasting relationship with a woman， I don't believe they'd agree with the approach much either。Though Markovik – sorry， Mystery – claims the techniques described within the book's pages is that of a Venusian artist （a play off of Venus， the goddess of love）， all the actions， terms， politics and suggested approaches scream "player。" Which is fine for those wishing to be a player， not so much for the ladies who have likely spent years of their lives telling them off。 And with a few of the techniques described （'negging，' 'indicating disinterest，' etc。）， I can't say I wouldn't be socking any "budding Venusians" within five feet myself。Ironically， out of the whole book， Mysteyr gives some clever advice to budding women picker-uppers that could easily substitute the whole book on its own on page 128: "Go， and be in the field， and listen to your intuition there。" Which makes sense and is completely contradictory to Mystery's teachings of selective moves and sayings。 But hey， who am I to judge？ Whatever works for you。All I'm saying is that， in the course of things， when you've got a rugged stud nursing a beer alone at a bar or， on the opposite side of the club， a guy with a fuzzy top hat and leopard-print coat parading a Playboy-bound pixie on each arm， I'm pretty sure many women would suddenly need a refill on their drinks。 。。。more
Giuseppe
，
Un libro molto particolare， devo ammetterlo， che inizia con un prologo quasi storico per poi concentrarsi su questo "metodo" che non trovo molto valido， a dirla tutta。 La valutazione di questo libro dipende molto dalla persona che lo legge e il suo scopo （semplice lettura o per imparare qualcosa）， inoltre trovo parecchio maschilista la visione della donna quasi come fosse un oggetto che è vittima dell'uomo e le sue tecniche， ma per piacere！ L'unico aspetto positivo viene dal fatto che si possono Un libro molto particolare， devo ammetterlo， che inizia con un prologo quasi storico per poi concentrarsi su questo "metodo" che non trovo molto valido， a dirla tutta。 La valutazione di questo libro dipende molto dalla persona che lo legge e il suo scopo （semplice lettura o per imparare qualcosa）， inoltre trovo parecchio maschilista la visione della donna quasi come fosse un oggetto che è vittima dell'uomo e le sue tecniche， ma per piacere！ L'unico aspetto positivo viene dal fatto che si possono analizzare e capire tanti comportamenti sociali， capirne il senso e migliorare il tipo di relazione che si ha con l'altro sesso。 。。。more
Bud Winn
，
Lots of memories - I was absorbed into the "pick up game" back hard in 2007。 Lots of memories - I was absorbed into the "pick up game" back hard in 2007。 。。。more
Aakruti
，
I think every woman should read this book as inoculation against PUAs。 As far as the author's purposes for writing this book， I think far less highly of it: this book teaches extremely nuanced and manipulative mind games， based on a deep understanding of psychology。 It has a demeaning view of women， as objects to be won-over。 One statement in particular assumes that any woman is attainable， even those who have significant others， or else if they're not interested in you， they're not worth wastin I think every woman should read this book as inoculation against PUAs。 As far as the author's purposes for writing this book， I think far less highly of it: this book teaches extremely nuanced and manipulative mind games， based on a deep understanding of psychology。 It has a demeaning view of women， as objects to be won-over。 One statement in particular assumes that any woman is attainable， even those who have significant others， or else if they're not interested in you， they're not worth wasting your time with。 Anyone who takes the tips in this book seriously is not looking for anything substantive， and has no regard for how their actions affect their "targets。" The book does not discuss how to deal with the emotional fallout from using such methods。 。。。more
Hasina Suliman
，
Interesting to consider the tactics used by men
Vasilis d1af Apostolou
，
Thought I could find some interesting insights about human psychology。 Not really。
Paul Kareta
，
Well， I recommend some real menthors or video programs to teach the basics of human interactions and courtship/ mating rituals in our society。 The best guys out there for as much as I know are the RSD group。 The book is ok， but its not life changing info
Ronn Levy
，
I don't get why people say its mysagonistic。。 mystery saying thing like hes the qaunter side of red pill movment。 Because of the negs？ People playfully neg eachother all the time。About the technic？ Too much rutines， its too hard to be a robot。。 I don't get why people say its mysagonistic。。 mystery saying thing like hes the qaunter side of red pill movment。 Because of the negs？ People playfully neg eachother all the time。About the technic？ Too much rutines， its too hard to be a robot。。 。。。more
Brian
，
Very insightful。 I don't think I have the personality to apply this in real life， however， and I'm not sure I'd want to even if I did。 Very insightful。 I don't think I have the personality to apply this in real life， however， and I'm not sure I'd want to even if I did。 。。。more
Ulises
，
Good book。 Remains relevant。 Innovative。
Fadwa
，
OMG！！ How Manipulative and dehumanizing！！The whole purpose of meeting people is to form relationships， yet with this fucked up method。。 It's all about scoring！！！ Don't care about one phone number， because you have 4 more girls to call WTH 😕I can't understand why isn't it enough to meet one partner and get together for good！！I was fascinated by the technique though！ It worh reading by girls。。 I believe it helps us understand some of our automated behaviors and impressions。 OMG！！ How Manipulative and dehumanizing！！The whole purpose of meeting people is to form relationships， yet with this fucked up method。。 It's all about scoring！！！ Don't care about one phone number， because you have 4 more girls to call WTH 😕I can't understand why isn't it enough to meet one partner and get together for good！！I was fascinated by the technique though！ It worh reading by girls。。 I believe it helps us understand some of our automated behaviors and impressions。 。。。more
Jez Jackson
，
It's a useful book for a guy who wants to successfully approach women but it's a bit ify in places。 I enjoyed reading it anyway and would recommend it for ideas and the fact the that this is the guy who started this modern movement of guys taking the power back from viscous feminists。 It's a useful book for a guy who wants to successfully approach women but it's a bit ify in places。 I enjoyed reading it anyway and would recommend it for ideas and the fact the that this is the guy who started this modern movement of guys taking the power back from viscous feminists。 。。。more
Tommy
，
Ultimate classic on how to be a pick-up artist， there is definitely deception involved in this but as Mystery says （roughly） it's the man's equivalent of "wearing make-up。" It is strangely scientific and I think he got the courtship process down accurately。 And it's the best "make-up" out there 。。hence the 5 star rating。The downfall of this "method" is that you may end up building a persona instead of learning how to be comfortable with your own real Self。 Having scripted lines will help in the Ultimate classic on how to be a pick-up artist， there is definitely deception involved in this but as Mystery says （roughly） it's the man's equivalent of "wearing make-up。" It is strangely scientific and I think he got the courtship process down accurately。 And it's the best "make-up" out there 。。hence the 5 star rating。The downfall of this "method" is that you may end up building a persona instead of learning how to be comfortable with your own real Self。 Having scripted lines will help in the beginning just to overcome overwhelming shyness 。。but if you continue down that path too long you will lose yourself in the process and become a machine。It's probably better to just go out there and be willing to be rejected， willing to "crash and burn" every time。 It's the only way to learn true courage and not have to rely on tricks。（I think women should read this book too。。。 just to know what these men are up to lol） 。。。more
Sabbir Shirajus
，
good to understand the basics of Pickup theories if you are into it。
Ralph N
，
One of those books that every insecure teenager was reading in the late 2000s
Gabriel Rocha
，
I wish i had this knowledge since my 15th :）
Abdel Ba
，